Unconfident

Confidence escapes me every time for I am as

Insecure as a church mouse

If you asked me to look in the mirror

What do I see?

Nine circles of hell like Dante’s Inferno

Reflected in my dead eyes

Abandoned all hope, you loser

As rejection runs on a loop in my mind

What could I blame today?

Hmm…let me see

An ex-boyfriend who saw me as a side piece?

A mother that abandoned a little baby at three weeks?

An unknown father?

A stranger on the street?

A hauntingly beautiful celebrity on a stage on Broadway?

Standing still for a minute

Dastardly rubbing the mini-beard threatening to grow like a cheap Jafar knock-off

Chuckling quietly as a ghost of a smile disappears

Regretting my shaved head Britney moments

Crazy eyes like a Moana chicken sidekick

Lost in another world

Full of Negan’s Lucille, the Mean Girls soundtrack, the 615 House discography

Staring at the broken girl

Broken huh?

A sharp gasp, piercing clutching at my imaginary Bl.A.S.P-y pearls

What will it be today?

Barefaced or a hint of lippy

Suddenly, a loud bang shocked me

Out of my reverie

Blood drained…drip, drip, drip

Clowny frowny teardrops on my cheek

My windshield wipers a.k.a my gimpy eyelashes blinking furiously

Trying to erase the evidence of my self-pity and self-esteem